Ordinary people don’t have super mental strength. We were not brought up to fully maximise our brain power. This is really too bad for me, because as I tell you in _____, our brain is such an incredible Feng Shui tool! I don’t know about you, but my parents never thought I would be more than ‘an average Singaporean’. Get an average job, marry an average man, have kids, go on annual holidays, look after parents when they are old, then when we are old, our kids will look after us. Grow old then die. As a matter of fact, my dad told me once: ‘Enjoy my landed property home. You girls will never get to live in a landed property again. ” Was it because he looked down on us? No. Was it because he thought he was a big somebody? Perhaps he was a little chauvinistic. But I believe the real reason was because he too, he knew that he was just average, but by some sheer stroke of good luck, he managed to get there! But he knew land prices was crazy in Singapore (and the rest of the world), and I think that in his heart, he genuinely really did not think we could ever afford more than an average government flat (which, for the sake of readers who don’t live here, costs a fair bit of money too!).

So I think in my case, because I was never brought up to think ‘I’ll be a great person in this life!’, coupled with my ‘naturally’ sullen and pessimistic ‘yang metal’ character at birth, and my childhood experiences as I told you about in ____, it was really hard not to feel depressed about bad things. I don’t know if I would have felt better if I had known then that other people were suffering as well, because as far as I could see, he seemed to be doing well, she seemed to be doing well. They all seem to be doing well, except me!!! Why? Why? Why? It’s so unfair!!! If she was suffering, then why does she still have a headful of hair? Why is my face covered in pimples, but her complexion is flawless?

I have discovered what you need to do, and I will share it with you here. You see, for an ordinary person, we only have say 50 ounces of mental strength and energy (a Go! Go! Go Getter has 100 ounces). I needed to split this 50 ounces amongst all that was going on in my life then: marriage, work, parents, parents-in-law, myself. In my case, money was the most pressing issue at hand then!!! So what you have to do, when you have nobody else who will help you is: Be realistic and practical! I only had my pathetic salary, and this pathetic salary came from doing my job. So by hook or by crook, I MUST KEEP MY JOB! Correct? No job, no money. I had to work a lot of overtime then, but I was forced to take public bus trudging all that paperwork home, because I had no money to take any other means of transport. Sometimes when I was really tired (so tired that I hid in the company toilet cubicle and cried), I wanted to take a cab home. Especially on Friday nights, I knew I had to bring a truckload of work home, so I just wanted to take a cab. Is that too much to ask for???  Too tired, too overwhelmed, and on the verge of losing this job that I MUST KEEP. So what has to give? I’m not proud to say this, but I stopped giving mum money. I stopped, because $200 was a lot to me!!! It meant that I could take taxi home once a week. Mind you! I’m not taking a taxi home to get changed and go to a disco, but if I brought more paperwork home (triple the load than I would normally bring home on Monday – Thursday) on a Friday, I could clear a lot of work over Saturday and Sunday. And if I could clear my overwhelming workload, I WOULD GET TO KEEP MY JOB!!! Please don’t misunderstand that I am telling you to stop giving your mum money. Oh no! If you continue to read my blog, once I made Feng Shui work, I started to give her money again! Because I was not able to give her money when I was in my 20s. But it was what I had to do, and in my case, my 💲💲wealthy 💲💲 mum really did not need the $200 from me! When you are at your wit’s end, what must you do? Be realistic and practical! Use your brain! Forget about filial piety, forget about love and mush, forget passion, forget about kinship. I’ll even go as far to say: Forget about your dreams and ideals!!! You have to survive first!!!