I contemplated how I should write this blog. Why? In all honesty, this advice that I am dishing out to you sounds ridiculous, even to myself. I’m going to tell you to lie to yourself and to cheat your mind. Even if something is not true, just pretend! Your mind does not know the difference, trust me! The reason why I tell you to lie to yourself is because ordinary people like us are normally stumped when we hit a roadblock, or when something does not go according to our plan. It’s ok if we can bounce back quickly, but we can’t. Well, I can’t. And I am pretty ordinary, so I can speak for most people. There are people who get themselves into a fix, and they stay stuck in it for soooooo long. That’s awful because:
This means that you can’t just sit here and sulk. Or sit there and fume. Or stand around and complain. Don’t do that. Why? Because no matter how much you hate the situation, you have to be realistic and you must function according to how the world works. I’m sorry, I wish that I could tell you that you (I) are important, and that your (my) opinion matters, but truly it doesn’t! Nobody cares about you (me), and the people who do care, they can’t do much about our situation! They love us, but they are not our supervisors who decide on our pay raise, neither are they our husband who is addicted to his work and who has no time for us! If you want your opinion to matter, then work really, really hard and be in a position where your opinion will matter. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, FOR EXAMPLE, HIS OPINION MATTERS!!!
So as ordinary people, we have to fit into this world that we live in. If you want more money, then go find a higher paying job. If you can’t find a higher paying job, then go study some more. If you hate to study, then go find an additional source of income to supplement your existing one. For e.g. you can work in your office job from 9am to 6pm, then you can go work in the evenings as a bartender. If the thought of working crazy long hours is not what you want to do, then find a job that you can work from home. Instead of watching tv after dinner, pick up the phone and do telemarketing sales. Instead of surfing the internet for cheap shopping buys, or surfing online tabloids for what’s happening in the life of a celebrity (which, by the way, has nothing to do with us), you can sign up for answering surveys, and this is also a good way to make some money in your spare time! Of course, you can also go buy a Toto ticket on every Monday and on every Thursday, and make sure that you can pray really hard that you strike Toto!
It drives me insane when I hear all sorts of reasons why people can’t get Feng Shui to work for them. I totally understand that life is tough, and battles wear us down. I myself have been whacked out (K.O.!!!) several times in my life too! The saying about being in the pits and the dumps – truly – there is a point in life where a person really can’t go down any further. ‘I have only my life left, take it if you want.’ But then I wait around, and… nobody wants to take my damn life, I am still alive! So what do I do? I sit around and I wait again. Then I wait around some more, and I’m so bored with sitting around and waiting around. I might as well get up and do something because I am still alive and it looks like I’m not going to die anytime soon!!!
我写这个部落格之前想了很久。为什么？说实话，我将向你发出的这个建议听起来很荒谬。 我要你欺骗自己，欺骗你的思想。即使某些事情不真实，你也要假装！ 我们人类的头脑其实不是很厉害， 它根本不在乎是真或假！ 我们普通人在我们遇到障碍时，或我们的计划没有根据我们说想象的如愿以偿时， 我们普通人肯定会感到非常失望难过。 如果我们可以迅速从失望难过反弹， 那么没事。 但我知道， 普通人很难做到。哎呀， 我是说我啦， 我不能。我真的很很平凡， 很普通。
如果一个人长期让自己陷入困境， 那太可怕了，因为：
（一） 生活还是要继续****，和
（二） 时间是我们最重要的资产****。
这意味着我们人类不能只是坐着发闷气， 也不能站在一边抱怨不停。 不， 千万不要着样做。 为什么？ 因为无论你多么厌恶你目前的情况，你必须要面对现实。 你必须要根据世界的运作方式而运作。 虽然我非常非常希望我能告诉你： “你（我）很重要”， 而且 “你（我）的意见很重要”，但事实并非如此！ 没有人关心你（我）， 那些关心我们的人， 他们对我们的情况帮不了多少！ 他们虽然爱我们， 但他们不是我们的上司， 他们不能决定我们是否明年可以加薪， 他们也不是我们的先生， 我的先生沉迷于他的工作没有时间陪我， 爱我的妹妹抽出时间陪我， 但她不是我的先生呀！ 如果你希望每个人注重你的意见，那么再加努力升级到一个重要的位置。 例如美国总统的位置吧， 特朗普的意见每个人都重视他的意见！
作为普通人，我们必须活在我们生活的这个世界！ 如果你想要更多的钱，那就找一份薪水更高的工作。 如果你找不到更高薪的工作，那就去提升你的专业资格。 如果你讨厌读书考试， 那就找一个额外的收入来铺贴你源来的收入。 例如你可以在办公室工作下班后，找份晚上调酒师的晚班兼职工作。 如果长时间疯狂工作不是你想要的， 那就找一份你可以在家工作的收入。 晚餐后不要看电视，拿起电话做电话销售。 不要整晚为了寻找更便宜的网站购物平台， 不要为了明天可以和同事闲聊莫莫名人的私生活， 整晚在网上小报上浏览这与我们无关的名人的私生活。 以其你这么做， 你不如报名参加回答网站调查，这也是在业余时间赚钱的好方法！ 当然，你也可以在每个星期一和每个星期四购买Toto票，发呀！
每次我听到我朋友无法让风水实现时， 他们所批评风水的理由让我感到很厌烦。 我完全明白生活是很艰难的， 不停的战斗把我们打败。 你们知道吧， 在我自己人生中，我何尝不是经历过无次的挑战， 我也被打败！ 一个人陷入谷底， 真的， 在生活中真的不能再进一步下去了， 就会和上帝说： “我只剩下我的命一条， 你要就拿去吧。” 但， 后来我等了。。。没有神， 也没有人想要我这该死的生命，我#%#@$#%$还活着！！！那我该怎么办？当然是继续等咯。 然而我等了很长的时间后， 事情没有改变， 我还活在， 等呀， 等呀， 我好无聊！ 我不妨站起来做点什么，因为我还活着呀！ 看起来我不会那么快死的！
However, if you really want to stand around or to sit around bitching about your life, yeah, you can do that! To whoever is willing to listen to you. If you can find someone who is happy to listen to your grouses day in and day out, I encourage you to meet up with him or with her everyday and to complain all that you can! Complain until you have no energy left to complain anymore.!!! Then get on with your Life, Phase (2). Let’s say that you are working in a miserable job earning a miserable pay, of course you should be complaining about how lowly paid you are! Of course! It’s so unfair! Here we are slogging our asses off, neglecting our family and working to the detriment of our health, and the money that we earn for our misery is not even enough!!! We want more money, but nobody at Management level gets our point. So Life, Phase (2) is about making your supervisor see why you deserve a promotion and a raise! I’ve seen grown-up men complain for years and years why they cannot or they should not find a higher paying job, and why they cannot or they should not study more, and why they cannot or they should not work past 6pm. I’m ‘impressed’ by their reasons:
| Life, Phase 2 | Why it cannot or it should not be done |
| Ask for a promotion and a pay raise | The stupid Management does not formulate policies that appreciate and retain talent like me. If I don’t get the promotion, it will be awkward for me to stay on.
My stupid Supervisor is biased and she does not appreciate my hard work. There’s no need to talk to her, it’s just a waste of time. No point talking to the Management or with the Supervisor because they will not listen. They only care about the bottom line, even if it means losing loyal employees like myself. |
| Find a higher-paying job | I have been doing accounting for 20 years, I can’t change to a new job. I have to start over.
Lazy, lah. I am waiting for my Supervisor to resign, because the next Supervisor will surely appreciate me and he will give me the promotion that I deserve. I have worked for so many years, why should I go and look for a job? I am waiting to be head-hunted. Nowadays competition is very stiff, it’s hard to change jobs. I wait for the job market situation to improve first. |
| Sign up for a night-class and upgrade yourself | Aiyo, I’m too old lah.
Aiyo, I’m too lazy lah. Aiyo, wait till I have saved enough money. Aiyo, wait till my children have grown up. Aiyo, wait till my children finish their primary school. Aiyo, wait till my children finish their secondary school. Aiyo, wait till my children finish their university studies. If the Supervisor does not resign, then no matter how many additional Certificates I get, it’s no use. The problem is with my Supervisor, not with my paper qualifications. |
| Take up an additional job in the evenings and on weekends | I need to rest.
I believe in work-life balance. I need to spend time with my family. I need to help my wife to do housework. |
Can you see what is happening here? These reasons are 100% valid! Yes they are! But what has these reasons got to do with getting a promotion and with getting a pay increment, or with finding a higher-paying job, or with skills-upgrading, or with getting a supplementary income? To get what you want, you have to actually do what really matters, in the real world! Your (my) opinion about how the world should be does not matter! Nobody cares!
但是，如果你真的想要发闷气， 你也可以！ 如果你幸运找到愿意听你发牢骚的好心人， 你一定要一日接一日， 每天每天和他见面并抱怨。 不要停止呀！ 看你几时抱怨完，没有精力再抱怨下去。。。 到时请开始你的生活，阶段（二）。不如说， 你讨厌你目前的工作， 应为工作难做， 工资又少到可怜， 你为了那几分钱做牛做马，忽视你的家庭，还损害你的健康， 那当然抱怨是应该的。 太不公平了！ 如果你想要更多的钱，但管理层无法理解你的观点， 那么生活，阶段（二）是要你和你的主管说明你为什么值得晋升和加薪！我见过许多成年男人多年来一直抱怨， 他们的理由让我’印象深刻’：
| 生活，阶段（二） | 为什么不能或不应该这样做 |
| 要求升级和加薪 | 愚蠢的管理层并没有制定留住人才的政策。如果我和上司谈晋升不成功，那么我留下来会很尴尬。
我愚蠢的上司有偏见，她不欣赏我的辛勤工作。没有必要跟她多说啦， 跟她讲话简直是浪费时间。 没有必要与管理层或上司交谈，因为他们不会倾听。他们只关钱和公司底线，即使意味着失去像我这样的忠诚员工， 他们也不管。 |
| 找一份薪水更高的工作 | 我在这份工作做了二十年，我不能换新工作。 如果换新的工作， 我必须重新开始， 又何必呢？
我懒惰。 我正在等待我的上司辞职，因为下一位上司肯定会欣赏我的人才，他肯定会弥补我的。 我只要等到现在的上司辞职就万事好。 我工作了这么多年，为什么要我去找工作？那些欣赏我的公司应该来挖角我。 如今外面竞争非常激烈，很难换工作。我等待就业市场情况先改善， 我才考虑看看。 |
| 报名参加夜间课程并自行升级 | 哎哟，我老了啦。
哎哟，我懒惰啦。 哎哟，等到我存够了钱再说。 哎哟，等到我的孩子长大了再说。 哎哟，等到我的孩子读完小学再说。 哎哟，等到我的孩子读完中学再说。 哎哟，等到我的孩子大学毕业再说。 如果上司没有辞职，那么无论我有没有进修都没有用的。问题在于我的上司对我有偏见，而不是我的学历不够。 |
| 在晚上和周末找额外工作 | 我需要休息。
我相信工作与生活要平衡。 我要配我的家人。 我需要帮助我的老婆做家务。 |
这些原因是100％有效的， 是100%真确的！ 但是，这些原因与获得晋升和加薪，或找到高薪工作，或技能升级，或跟补充收入有什么关系？ 你如果想得到你想要的东西，你必须在现实世界中， 做些实际的事情和行动！你（我）对于世界的观点并不重要！ 没人在乎你（我）！
