For over 20 years, I suffered from insomnia. As children, my Dad enjoyed playing this stupid game of tickling us when we were sound asleep, and he found it funny when we stirred, and we moved our hands or legs to get away from the tickling. Another stupid game. 🤬 I know that I’m older, and that I no longer live with Dad, but it’s like a shadow I can’t shake off.

Plus I have that sort of mind that never sleeps. Again, as kids, my parents (especially my Mum) taught us to always prepare for emergency days. Couple that with my inflexible ‘strong metal’ character, so for many years, I couldn’t stop thinking what if this happens, what if that happens? I did not like this ‘monkey🐒 mind’ of mine, yet I could not control it.

I wanted my life to get better. Nobody owns this ‘monkey🐒mind’ but me! It is inside my head, for goodness sake! 😥 My Dad and my Mum are part of my past, but they do not live in, and they do not control my brain. So I told myself I had to take action! I was the only one who could think positive, think good things! This does not mean that I do not think bad things. Those irritating thoughts still creep in, but I force myself – consciously – to visualize more and more goodies (to the point that bad thoughts are a soft nag at the back of my head). Daydreaming will not help you if you do not think good things – remember that! I know I said it’s good to daydream, but you gotta control those thoughts! 🤜

小时候，父亲很喜欢玩一个游戏。我们入睡后，他喜欢玩搔痒游戏，看到我们迷迷糊糊在半梦半醒状态里躲搔痒，他会偷偷笑。哎呀，总之又是一个无聊的‘笨游戏’！🤬

妈妈疼爱我们，整天怕我们不能照顾好自己，所以从小到大都教我们未雨绸缪。凡事都要有打算。这两个原因还有其他不便说的因素真的害到我多年无法安眠。 再加上我这个脑袋最大的毛病是胡思乱想，想不停！😨 躲在我头里的‘猴子🐒脑袋’整整折磨我超过二十多年， 尤其到了睡觉时间， 它就加倍‘起头风’。不过你想想， 在这世上，除了我，还有谁有资格，有权利， 有办法控制我（我！）的‘猴子🐒脑袋’呢？爸爸妈妈的做法虽然让我有‘阴影’，不过那些已经是我的过去！爸爸妈妈不住在我脑力，我已经搬出来了， 现在我已经长大了！只有我能！我一定要控制我这‘猴子🐒脑袋’！

如果我想未来人生过得越来越好，我一定要往好处想！好也要过，不好也要过！那么就搏一搏吧！以其想像我前途黑暗，不如想像我前途无量，前途光明!!! 🙌 读者们， 你做白日梦时一定要想美好的幻想世界，知道吗？如果不好的‘声音’还是不停的在脑后唠叨，你要有意想更多更多好的画面，把不好的掩盖着！加油！ 💪