cinderella quotes 1 edited

So after you read the story of Cinderella, what happens? Well, in my case, the concept of Prince Charming is reinforced in my mind! My full-time housewife Mum depended on my Dad for everything (or so it seemed like that at that time). My Dad went out to work, he provided for us and because he was an Engineer by trade, he was capable of and he would fix all the leaks and holes in the home.  For me, it was never a problem being a damsel in distress, because my Mother bore with all sorts of nonsense that Prince Charming threw on her. It was ‘normal’ for me to be subservient to a man, as long as he provided for me.

However, there are many permutations to the Prince Charming-Cinderella concept. The most obvious one being a housewife is terribly unhappy being a stay-at-home. As a result, when she educated her daughter, she ingrained in her (the daughter) the theory of a woman being independent. So imagine the confusion for the daughter growing up, as she sees Dad providing for the family, but Mum resisting her role. Coupled with last century’s rise of woman power, this concept of Prince Charming-Cinderella is indeed very confusing for our young ladies nowadays! 😅 Furthermore, because all Mums love their daughters, and they don’t want their daughters to suffer, they instill ideas that (1) a woman must be independent, yet (2) don’t date a man who cannot give you a better life than what you can give yourself. Ya, it’s true! Very confusing, don’t you think? 🤔❓❓❓⁉

And then there is a practical side of wanting Prince Charming. For instance, if your boyfriend has a car, he could come pick you up from home and send you to and from work everyday. You can sleep in, instead of waking up early to squeeze in public transport. Plus you will be the envy of your colleagues because you arrive in style! If he had been working for some time, he would already have a credit card, and he would have some savings, and a girl would not have to eat in a food court or hawker centre everyday, just to save money. Or if he already had sufficient savings, the lovebirds could get married earlier and own their own home faster! I’m exaggerating, of course, but you see, all these can also be considered ‘damsels-in-distress’ situations. This is why I say that modern-day damsels are in disguise and worse, they are in denial. Think about it, it’s the same right?

Cinderella quotes 2. edited

I once met a Chinese mum who had lived in Singapore for more than 30 years. She worked as a masseur, whilst her husband remained in China and he worked as a tradesman. Their daughter was educated here in Singapore, and when she qualifed (of course she would make it, with her smart mother rooting for her! 💫) for our local University, her masseur mum told her to only hang out with the affluent group of friends. Did you think that the masseur mum thought her daughter, a soon-to-be graduate of our local university, would be incapable of providing for herself and her family? Of course not! But this masseur mum told me her rationale, and I sometimes wonder why my mum never told me this! You see, if I had married into a rich family, I would still have to ‘struggle’ in life. For instance, I would have to adapt to the rich way of living, and even though I would be working in my husband’s family business, alas, I would still have to deal with suppliers, deadlines and staff. Life’s struggles would still be very real. It’s not that rich people do not have to ‘struggle’. But the only difference is that I would already be on a platform 500 metres higher than everyone else (who did not marry into a rich family), and my struggle to the very top (the peak!) would be 500 metres less than if I had started my journey from the very bottom. It makes sense, right!!! Wow! A clever masseur mother indeed! She must have thought about her theory for some time. 🙂👍

But because we are humans, and we have our own minds, and we have feelings, and life is unpredictable, we cannot really control who we fall in love with, or whether it will all work out. Or can we? And marrying into a rich family is not solely dependent on my wishing. The rich man also has to want to marry me. Finally, because life in a rich family is also very real, a woman would also face the same headaches and insecurities that all married couples face. Fighting over how the kids are brought up, late nights that husbands keep because of social entertaining, keeping up appearances for the sake of the family etc etc. She would also have to work very hard to keep up with her new rich family. I think the character of a woman plays a huge part in wanting to really marry and succeed in her marriage to Mr Rich. If she wants Prince Charming in her life, she would have to work very hard to keep Prince Charming in her life, and I’m not sure if this is what our modern young girls want to do. But I am certainly a damsel in distress. LOL!